M & J’s “Not By My Side” finds peace on the other side of lost love

Heartbreak is a complex thing. Missing someone doesn’t necessarily imply you want them back. M & J explore that emotional dichotomy with “Not By My Side,” a song born from the sensation of wanting a lost partner back only to realize that perhaps both of you should stay apart slowly.

That thought provides a very accessible emotional underpinning for the track. Loss is seldom as simple as sadness. There are times when you remember a past relationship and feel longing and confusion, and you finally understand why things ended. “Not By My Side” is about that journey, telling a story that goes beyond the initial desire to have someone back.

What's remarkable about the notion is that it has an emotional pivot at its heart. The song begins with a backward look, but its eventual perspective is one of acceptance of what has happened. This is a reassuring realization. Not every ending is a mistake, and not every person we mourn is meant for our present.

M & J provide a musical home for that realization through a personal concept that is easy for listeners to grasp. Anyone who has experienced the difficult aftermath of a breakup can relate to the feeling of playing back memories as you try to make sense of life without someone who once held such a significant place in it. The song “Not By My Side” is less about heartbreak and more about the clarity that can follow heartbreak. The emotional arc of the song, from desire to acceptance, is a sort of resolution.